Nov. 30, 2008

Jake's Funeral/Memorial Service: 3:30 p.m. Saturday, December 6, 2008, Arlington Heights United Methodist Church, 4200 Camp Bowie Blvd., Fort Worth, Texas

Visitation: 5 to 9 p.m. Friday at the home of Johnny and Carolyn Cartwright

Memorials: In lieu of flowers, donations may be made ‘In Memory of Jake Cartwright’ to ThriveWell Cancer Foundation, P.O. Box 29331, San Antonio, Texas 78229-0331. Please mark all donations “For Research.” Jake was a strong believer in cancer research and any donations will be given to cancer research facilities, such as START where Jake was a patient earlier this year.

Nov. 30, 2008

John Jake Cartwright

Born February 24, 1983

at 5:10 a.m.

Died November 30, 2008

at 8:50 a.m.

He wanted his death to be between himself and God with no one watching.

Thank you for your prayers!

Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 29, 2008

Jake continues to fight and hold on. At one time he had a room full of pretty women for an audience, and we thought he might let go, but he didn't. Now, as hard as it is, we are going to try to leave him alone for a little while, and see if he wants to die in peace with just himself and God present. Pray that Jake will stop fighting soon and that God will take him home to his room in heaven.

Keep praying,
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 28, 2008

Please pray Jake home to Jesus in heaven. He is in a lot of pain and is fighting terribly. Let him go be with his Savior. If You are praying for a miracle, the miracle is that Jesus died on the cross for Jake's sins and that He is waiting for Jake in heaven. Pray for Jake to die easily without a fight. It's time we let him go.

Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 27, 2008

One of my prayers was that I would have one more Thanksgiving with Jake, and my prayer was answered "yes". I also prayed for one more Christmas with him, but I don't know if that prayer will be answered "yes" or "no" because Jake woke with blood in his urine. (I know Jake is in God's hands and He will take Jake when He is ready, not when I am.) We called the nurse who blamed it on the tumors in the liver not allowing blood to clot correctly causing the blood in his urine. Whatever. I know it is because his organs are starting to shut down as God gets closer to calling him home. Yet even with the blood in his urine and pain in his stomach area and back, Jake was a real fighter and wanted to go to his Aunt Tami's and Uncle Todd's for Thanksgiving so we loaded him up in the car and arrived only slightly after the 1:00 time set for the meal. Jake was hurting in his wheelchair and wanted to be placed on the ground on Todd and Tami's patio. I guess the solidness of the concrete felt good to his back so we did what he asked. It was so nice for Johnny to have the help of his brother, Billy, and his brother-in-law, Bill, to help with some of the lifting. Jake's cousins Elizabeth, Amy, and Kyle were a big help, too as they were always ready to be "gophers" and go for anything Jake asked for. Jake's Aunt Tanya was also at his "beck and call". Johnny's brother, Micheal and his son, Jeff, were there also. Later in the afternoon, Jake's Aunt Renee, cousin Jill, her husband, Rich, and their son, Riley Scott came over (yes, Sarah has Riley Aaron and Jill has Riley Scott) and Rich became a big help to Johnny as well. (Uncle Scott is in Denver visiting with his son (Jake's cousin) Ethan for the Thanksgiving holiday.) Jake would go back and forth from the concrete to the wheelchair to Todd's Captain's Chair and back to the concrete and so on. Jake didn't eat very much, but he had a lot of great conversations with everyone. It's amazing how sharp his wit still is at times and how massive his sports knowledge is. In the evening, Jake wanted to go back outside so Todd and Tami found their patio heater and set it up for Jake along with a neck massager with heat. When we finally decided it was time to head home, (we decided against the jacuzzi garden tub as lifting Jake in and out would cause him too much pain) Bill helped Johnny load Jake into the car and then went with them to our house to help Johnny get Jake inside and situated for bed. I stopped at Jake's house in Benbrook and picked up a few more things and then stopped at my mom's for a short visit with her and my brother, Kip.
I know it may not sound like much of a Thanksgiving, but it really was the best we could have hoped for. Jake was still here with us and awake most of the day and I will forever treasure this Thanksgiving in my heart and remember it fondly.

Keep praying (specifically that we can keep Jake's pain under control and keep him comfortable).
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 26, 2008

Jake slept well last night and woke with his back in less pain. It may be Lisa's presence or the board under the mattress. Tomorrow night will be the true test. We let Jake sleep until it was time to take his meds at 9:30 and then he went back to sleep. He finally woke up around 11:00 a.m. and we moved him to the couch. The paralysis has started to move up his body, which is normal, and his arms and hands are getting weaker. He ate a bowl of Trix, which seems to be one of his favorite foods right now, and we had to use 2 sided tape to attach the spoon to his hand. He then took a bath and sat outside for a while. Stephanie came over to visit Jake and Samson. After she left, Jake went back to the couch for a nap. He slept from about 2:00 to 5:00 on the c0uch until Sarah and Riley arrived. Riley wanted to go for a walk in his stroller so we woke Jake and asked him if he wanted to go, too. He said yes, so PaPa, Nana, Memaw, Sarah, Riley, and Jake went for a walk around the block. We met Ginger the dog on the way as the owner was out and introduced us. Riley started to get restless after 2 times around so Sarah took Jake for another trip around and PaPa, Nana, Memaw, and Riley went back to the house. Chad spent the day at Johnny's sister Tami's house preparing as much Thanksgiving dinner as they could ahead of time. We are SO lucky to have 2 such excellent cooks in our family. After Chad and Tami finished, Chad came over to join us for hamburgers on the grill as did Johnny's sister, Tanya, and her family, Bill, Amy, Elizabeth, Muffy, and Missy. The hamburgers were delicious as Johnny is a pretty good cook, too. After dinner, Jake's friend Ben came to visit and we sat outside under the patio heater until 9:00 p.m. It was a good day for Jake and he is looking forward to going to Tami and Todd's for Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow and soaking in their jaccuzi garden tub.

Keep praying,
Carolyn/Mom

P.S. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Nov. 25, 2008

Jake woke from a restless night even though we got the new gel pad for his bed (more on that later). His back and neck were hurting again but, he doesn't really complain. He just lets you know in the hopes that you can help him do something about it. Johnny and I got him ready and took him for his last radiation treatment on the tumors in his brain. He got to keep his mask that he wore during the treatments. It is pretty cool. He saw Dr. Freeman, the radiation oncologist, and was released from his care. All the nurses and other workers who got close to Jake during his chemotherapy and radiation treatments came by to wish him well as he is now under the care of his Home Health doctor. Johnny and I can't say enough to thank the doctors and staff at this Texas Oncology. For those of you that don't know, when Jake was diagnosed with Stage IV cancer in April 2007, his first doctor at a Texas Oncology in Lewisville gave him 3-6 months to live. Because of the care of Dr. Crim in Fort Worth and the clinical trials he got Jake into at START in San Antonio, Jake is still with us a year and a half later. More importantly, Dr. Crim became Jake's friend and confidant. Jake could tell him things that he couldn't tell Johnny or me. Even though he was unable to cure Jake of the cancer, Dr. Crim will forever hold a special place in our hearts for the extra time he gave us with Jake.
Back to the events of the day. After radiation, we took another trip to Wal-Mart. It's amazing how hard it is to find electric carts when you need them, but finally one became available and Johnny got Jake into it. It's also amazing how different carts are from store to store. This cart's power and steering mechanism we pretty far away from Jake and he had trouble at times, but again, he doesn't complain. He just keeps going and going like the Energizer Bunny. After shopping, when Johnny was putting Jake in the front seat of the Cavalier, he tripped over Jake's big feet and slammed into the side of the car. Jake didn't get hurt so I didn't think anything of it (sorry Johnny), but if you see a dent in the back passenger side door in the Cavalier, know that Johnny's the one who put it there. After stopping at Barbara Marvin's office to have her notarize some paperwork for us (Thank you, Barbara!) we headed home. Jake was exhausted and we put him on the couch where he slept all afternoon.
While Jake was asleep, I decided to check out Jake's hospital bed. I lay/laid (I can never remember which is correct) down in the bed and immediately my butt sank. I couldn't imagine sleeping in that bed all night. With Mayme's help, we turned the mattress over and it still sank in the middle. We called the Home Health people and they said it shouldn't do that, but later someone who called said it should. Well we knew it shouldn't so we asked for another gel pad. After they brought it and switched it out, I again lay/laid on the mattress and new pad, and my butt still sank down and my feet were still raised slightly. Johnny looked under the bed and we determined that the springs of the bed in the butt area were wearing out so we cut a piece of particle board we had in the garage and put it under mattress on top of the springs. The bed felt better to me, but we will have to see how Jake feels in the morning.
When Jake woke up, Blake and her friend, Valerie, brought dinner over. What can I say about sweet Blake? Not only did she help organize both last year's softball tournament and this year's, now she brings us food. We love you, Blake and "thank you" isn't enough for all you have done for Jake, Johnny, and me. Dinner was brisket, macaroni casserole, beans, and brownies for dessert. DELICIOUS! Lisa, Susie, and Kevin joined us for dinner and Jake ate more than he has in a long time. Lisa and Susie spent the night again (Jake sleeps better when they are here) and hopefully he will wake with his back feeling better.

Keep praying!
Carolyn/Mom

P.S. I was brought up by my mother to write thank-you notes for everything given to me, but it would take hours to write the hundreds that would be required to thank all of you for your prayers, friendship, food, and financial support. As it is, Johnny and Mayme spend hours doing tickets for the quilt raffle. THANK YOU to all of you who have bought tickets for the Texas Quilt. Remember, Jake will draw the winning ticket on Dec. 13th.

Nov. 24, 2008

What started out with a rough night ended with a good day. Jake did not have a good night last night. Sometimes he keeps going and going and doesn't know when to stop. He wants to put on a good front for whoever comes to visit, not wanting them to see how weak or tired he really is. He tends to sit in his wheelchair for hours on end, visiting with everyone who comes by. As a result, his back, neck, and head start to hurt. That's what happened last night. Don't get me wrong. He wants and needs his friends and family to visit so don't stop coming please, but it would help Jake if you would come by before 9:00 p.m. or leave by 9:00 p.m. if you arrive before then. Again, PLEASE don't stop visiting. His days aren't as long and boring when you come and visit with him.
We finally had to wake up Jake at 11:00 a.m. to take him for his radiation treatment. This is the first time I have been to the oncology clinic in Fort Worth. One of the girls from the office was waiting at the door with an ESPN magazine for Jake. They are so sweet to him. We didn't have to wait too long for his treatment. Johnny helps the nurses lift Jake onto the table. The machine is large but takes only 30 seconds after Jake is put into position. After radiation we came straight home as our Home Health nurse was coming by at 1:00 to check on Jake. When we arrived, Stephanie, Ryan's girlfriend, was here for a visit. She really misses Samson and he misses her so she comes by to visit both he and Jake. The nurse arrrived and brought by a wheelchair pad to help with Jake's pain and placed an order for a second pad and a gel mattress for the bed instead of the adjustable air mattress. He also ordered pads to put over the rails of the hospital bed. He checked on Jake and said he is doing as well as can be expected considering. He told us we could increase the extended release morphine to help Jake as the pain increases. Not long after he left, the gel mattress, rail pads, and wheelchair pad arrived. All these should help with Jake's pain. Jake slept most of the afternoon on the couch and seemed to feel better when he woke up. He then went outside and sat on the patio under the heater. We had put one of the pads in the bottom of the wheelchair and Johnny was with Jake but was busy doing something. Mayme and I were inside when suddenly we heard something. Johnny was trying to get our attention as the pad had slipped out of the wheelchair and Jake along with it. Johnny caught him before he hit the ground but was having trouble getting him back in the chair. We finally got him into one of the patio chairs and again had a good laugh. It must not sound like it when you read it, but it really was funny after we got Jake safely in the chair. The pad is a slippery material and I can't believe they didn't send a cover with it. We pinned a flannel pillowcase over it and it seems to be keeping him in the wheelchair. He wanted to go for a walk so with a flashlight in hand, we walked around the block. After the first time around, Lisa and Susie arrived, and they walked around the block a second time with us. When we got back, Sarah and Riley also came over for a visit. We ate lasagna and Texas Toast for dinner on the patio and when it got too cold for Jake, we moved inside. After Sarah and Riley left, I went to Bed, Bath, and Beyond to get a neck/back massager for Jake and then went to Wal-Mart to pick up a few more pajama type pants for him. When I returned, Amber, one of Jake's friends from Benbrook United Methodist Church (BUMC), was visiting. She is going to come back to visit another time to talk to Jake more as it was getting late. After she left, we all went to bed and Jake seemed to be feeling better. He asked for a bowl of Trix and some "cold" grapes and he ate those before he went to sleep. You never know what he will eat and when. I just hope he sleeps well on the gel mattress. If anyone has suggestions for anything health care wise that might help with Jake's pain, please put it in a comment on the blog as we need any help you can give us with things that might help.
Sorry these blogs get so long and wordy. I think I am writing them as a diary for me as well as a blog for you so I tend to go overboard with details.

Keep praying! (I know you do, but I like to type it anyway.)
Love,
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 23, 2008

Another beautiful day and another good day for Jake, except for a few aches and pains. We all slept in this morning and lay in bed as long as our backs would let us. Jake woke up aroung 9:00 and as always, he started his day with a long, hot bath. They help his body relax and loosens the muscles of his back and neck which tend to give his the most problems. Today our shopping trips took us to Home Depot, Joann's, Office Depot, Toys R Us, and Petco. At Home Depot, Jake used another electric cart to get around. It is so nice when stores have them available for their customers. We bought a new shower head with 2 heads, one with a detachable sprayer on a hose that Jake can use to reach down to where he sits in the bathtub. Jake didn't go into Joann's but Mayme and I went in so she could get some sewing needles, embroidery thread, and marking pencils. She is going to embroider my students' names on fleece throws that I am giving each of them for Christmas. (Sh! Don't tell.) She and I then went into Office Depot to pick me up a set of overhead markers for school. At Toys R Us (which provided a wheelchair but not an electric cart) Jake picked out a toy box for Riley. I have a front window in our house, something I have always wanted but never had in a house before. Of course, I am putting my Christmas tree in the window, so I needed to clean up Riley's toys from that area. Now they are in the toy box Jake picked out. On to Petco (which provided nothing for their handicapped shoppers so we continued to use the wheelchair from Toys R Us) to pick up a bag of dog food for Samson. Finally, a side trip to Sonic, and home again to watch the end of the Cowboy game. (Go, Cowboys! At least you didn't lose to the 49ers.) Lisa came over after we got back home and she and Jake sat outside for most of the afternoon under the new patio heater. Chris and Steve McMullin came over to visit as did Stephanie, Ryan's girlfriend, as well as Chad, Sarah, and Riley. Chad, Sarah, and Riley stayed for dinner and we ordered Chinese food from China Grille. Jake and Lisa ate Sweer and Sour chicken and fried rice. Jake started getting tired around 9:00 so we moved inside and watched more football. Matt, Blake, Blake's parents, and brother also came over for a visit. When we finally got Jake ready for bed, he was complaining of pains in his stomach area and back. Johnny ran to Wal-Mart to get Jake another heating pad. Please pray specifically that Jake's pain in his stomach area and back will lesson or go away totally.

Thank you again for all your prayers.
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 22, 2008

It continues to amaze me what the power of prayer can do. Other than his legs being completely useless and his fingers and hands difficult to control at times, Jake is doing remarkably well and eating small amounts of food. When he got up, he ate some cinnamon toast for breakfast. Then he decided it was time to rearrange our den where he spends most of his time. We switched the couch with the recliner and chair/ottoman. We also put the TV on a trunk on our hearth so it is a little higher and easier for Jake to see. Sarah, Chad, and Riley came over after the switch and stayed with Jake and Memaw while Johnny and I went to Home Depot. We bought a patio heater for Jake as he spends so much time outside and it has really been cool the last few days. After we finally got the heater together, Jake sat outside next to it for quite some time. Hopefully he won't be as chilled when he sits outside as this has always been a concern for us. Johnny and I cleaned up fall leaves in the afternnoon and Jake visited with Lisa, Kevin, and Haley. In the early evening, Johnny and I decided to go to Wal-Mart and Jake said he wanted to go too so, with Memaw in tow, the 4 of us loaded up in the Cavalier. Jake wanted to use one of the electric carts, so we put him onto one and he took off. He was a shopaholic for one hour and filled up the basket on the front of the cart. At one point, Johnny went by himself to the food section and I went to the pharmacy section to get some ThermaCare patches for Jake's back and neck. I left Jake and Memaw in the men's department looking for gloves, hats, pajama pants, etc. When I got back to Jake and Memaw, she was putting a belt around Jake as he sat in the cart. It seems that while I was gone, Jake slid down off the seat into the foot area of the cart. Memaw couldn't lift him back into the seat so Jake had to ask a Good Samaritan who was walking by to lift him into the seat of the cart. The poor guy had had rotator cuff surgery recently and said he would do his best and he did. Jake's comment was "I can't believe both my parents left me!" Oh well. We all had a good laugh about it as there is nothing else you can do. Jake wasn't done shopping, so now that he was belted in, he headed to the food section and threw all of his old favorites into the cart - Trix cereal, Cheetos, Fritos, cinnamon rolls, and Little Debbie cakes. We finally had to make him leave saying we could go back tomorrow. As we were checking out, we realized we were in the car with the wheelchair in the trunk and we had approximately 10 bags of groceries and a bag of dog food. It's a good thing the Cavalier has the fold down back seat as we were able to put bags of groceries in the space at the back of the truck. As it was, Memaw and I had bags between us in the back seat and I had to hold the dog food in my lap. Another memory for us to laugh about. We stopped at Whataburger on the way home and Jake got his usual #1 plain and dry - meat and bread only - and a #1 for Lisa who was coming over and we headed home. Jake ate half of the burger and half of the fries and at 9:00 we took him to his bed and went to bed ourselves. Lisa and Susie spent the night so we should get a good night sleep.
Keep praying as you can see from the blog how well the prayers are helping Jake lead as normal a life as possible.
We love you all,
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 21, 2008

Jake had another good day today. Lisa and her dog, Susie, spent the night last night to give Johnny, Memaw, and me a break from Jake's demands during the night. Of course when Lisa is here he sleeps through the night. Sarah came over in the morning to spend some time with Jake. She took Jake in his wheelchair for a walk around the block. Jake loves to be outside as he always has since he was a baby. Eric, one of Jake's best friends from elementary, middle, and high school showed up for a visit when Sarah and Jake returned from their walk and they had a good visit. At 11:00, Johnny took Jake to his radiation treatment. On the way home they stopped at Subway. I got home around 1:00 as my school dismissed at noon. Jake was sitting on the back patio enjoying the day. One of Jake's roommates from Tarelton, Brett, came to visit next and also had a good visit with Jake in the backyard. Next came Johnny's brother, Billy, with some venison and red snapper. He and Jake had a good visit, too. Johnny's brother, Scott, came over for dinner and to spend the night and help with Jake during the night. While we were eating dinner, Scott's son-in-law, Rich, came for a visit with his and Jill's son, Riley Scott. Jake went to his bedroom with Scott around 9:30 and they sat up watching a replay of the Aledo vs. Everman football game. I guess you can tell Jake is doing well and we have your prayers to thank for that so keep praying!

Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 20, 2008

It was a long night with Jake last night. He decided he was hungry and at 12:00 midnight he requested a grilled cheese sandwich. I didn't make it crispy enough the first time, so I had to take it back to the stove and cook it a little longer. At 2:00 a.m. he asked for an apple. At 4:30 a.m. he said my snoring was keeping him awake so I moved to the couch in the living room. I am glad he ate as this is the answer to many prayers, but does he have to do it in the middle of the night?! What's funny though is that this is so "Jake." He has always been a demanding child and a night owl, so why did I think it would be different just because he has cancer. We are trying to keep a sense of humor in all of this. It may be hard to understand that, but it helps. Jake had another radiation treatment today. They don't seem to be helping as he seems to be regressing a little each day, but I'm pretty sure he would be much worse if he wasn't having the treatments. After radiation, he and Johnny went to Bed, Bath, and Beyond to buy a few more towels for our house as Jake says the ones we have are too small and too thin. He and Johnny also went to McDonalds for a shake. Jake ordered chocolate but didn't like the taste so he ended up drinking Johnny's vanilla shake. One of Jake's best friends, Kevin, came by today and took Jake to Ryan's house where Jake was living before he moved in with us to pick up some more of his things such as DVDs and clothes. While Jake was with Kevin, Johnny was able to go to his office to drop off some paperwork and pick up more paperwork. Late in the afternoon, Jake decided to try and lay on an air mattress in the living room to watch TV. It seemed to help for awhile, but then he went back to his bedroom. Thank you so much to Joann and Terri who brought us Chicken Express for dinner. What a nice surprise! It is one of Jake's favorite foods and he ate a biscuit and some mashed potatoes. Jake is now in bed and hopefully he will sleep better tonight.
Thank you for all your positive responses to the blog and thank you to those of you who forwarded it on to others. It is nice to hear from people we have not heard from in awhile. Thank you for understanding that it is easier to write one blog than to talk to many people on the phone. We know you are all out there praying.
Here we go again. Jake is asking for one of his favorite foods, "Easy Mac." Having it at 11:20 p.m. is also so "Jake." It's nice to know that Jake hasn't really changed on the inside.

Thank you for all your emails and blog responses. We love you all very much.
Please keep praying.
Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 19, 2008

Jake had a good day today. He slept well last night and took a 40 minute bath this morning. He loves baths as they ease his aching body. He went for his radiation treatment with Johnny and Memaw, his grandmother. It takes a lot out of him to be lifted into the car, driven across town, lifted into the wheelchair and then onto the radiation table. The treatment takes only a few minutes. On the way home he fell asleep. This morning one of his hospice nurses came by to check on him and his social worker came by this afternoon. When I got home from work, Jake was sitting in his wheelchair on the back patio with Lisa. It is always good to see Jake sitting outside in the backyard instead of laying on the couch or bed. It was a beautiful, warm evening. Lisa had brought Susie, her dog, over to see Jake. That made 6 dogs at our house - Johnny's and my dogs, Kobi and Kori; Memaw's dogs, Smokey and Mimi; and Samson, Jake's dog. It's a real zoo at times, especially when you add in our cat, Princess. Anyway, Jake looks good today and his speech is understandable most of the time. Occassionally it gets garbled, but it is better than yesterday. Keep praying and lifting us up. God hears you.

Carolyn/Mom

Nov. 18, 2008

I know you all would rather be reading Jake's cancer blog, but since he hasn't blogged in some time, I thought I would start a blog to keep you updated on his progress. For those of you that don't know, Jake came to Johnny's and my home in Fort Worth on Friday, Nov. 14th from Harris Southwest Hospital where he had been for almost a week. He entered the hospital on Saturday, November 8th after attending his 2nd Annual Softball Tournament Fund Raiser for approximately an hour. He was not eating because of almost constant nausea and frequent vomiting. How he sat at the tournament for an hour is beyond me. His strength was unbelievable considering how weak he was. While in the hospital, Jake slowly lost the use of his legs. He still has pain in them, but he is now unable to stand on his own. He continues to show the Jake spirit though and doesn't complain very often about his predicament. Johnny is working from home and is able to help Jake throughtout the day with his needs and wants. Johnny's mom is also staying with us and she is a blessing to us in so many ways. I continue to teach during the day then come home and help out in the evenings and at night as much as I can. Johnny continues to take Jake to the doctor for radiation treatments on the 12 cancer lesions in his brain. At this writing, Jake has 5 radiation treatments left. Their intent is to give Jake a better quality of life and to give him more time with us. We know eventually he will succumb to the cancer, but we treasure each minute of every day.
I will try to keep everyone updated on Jake through this blog. Please know that your prayers are lifting us up and that we would not be doing as well as we are without them. Please pray for Jake to be comfortable and free from pain as much as possible. It's amazing what prayers can do. They may not have cured him of cancer, but they give all of us strength and comfort.

Carolyn/Mom